It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
