on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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