fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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