ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
