Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
