is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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