I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
