well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
did i just pee glitter
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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