used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize