that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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