You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I'm always down for nudity.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
