Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
