Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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