Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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