Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize