I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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