she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize