He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize