your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
