its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
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