I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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