He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
