I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
