i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
