I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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