We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
