What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
