Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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