yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
