no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
