i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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