vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Randomize
