Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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