Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
