thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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