Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
