we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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