please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
