it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
