Do vagina's smell?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
