After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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