please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Randomize
