those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
operation harelip BJ is a go
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
