Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Randomize
