At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
