It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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