I skipped work to stalk him.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
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