I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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