Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
