I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize